“To thine own self be true”
Okay, it's time to really be truthful with ourselves, to really sit down and have an honest conversation with that inner voice. You know the one that’s always talking, and I mean always. That voice comes with a lot of emotional baggage. There’s the negative self-talk, the doubt, the questioning,and the list goes on and on.
What you may not know is that you are not that voice. Let’s say it together
YOU ARE NOT THAT VOICE. IT DOES NOT DEFINE YOU.
Realizing that your inner voice is separate from who you are is the first step towards discovering your authentic self. Freeing yourself from this emotional baggage is crucial. Dwelling on the past prevents you from participating in the present, which is the only place you truly can experience love, happiness and fulfilment. Dealing with negative self-image and painful emotions head on is not easy. Not only is it the key to experiencing your life in the present, it is also the key to good health and well-being. I think of the quote by Freud:
“Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways”
If we don't deal with these painful emotions when they occur they will resurface more intensely later on and sometimes can be quite toxic, showing up as insomnia, anger, fear, anxiety, chronic stress or even disease or illness. Instead of burying emotions or obsessing over them, we can learn other options for handling things that are holding us back. You can observe it, experience it, learn from it and then release it...let it go.
Realize the feeling, identify the emotion and say it in your mind. Use words like “oh look, anxiety is here” instead of “I feel anxious”.
Take a few deep breaths and bring your focus inside yourself. Do not pay attention to whatever triggered this emotion, instead observe the emotion itself. Accept the feeling is here. Look at it from all sides. What color is it? Is it causing a physical reaction?
Allow yourself to feel or express this emotion.
Bring attention to any physical symptoms you may be experiencing. Where does this feeling reside in my body? Cry if you need to cry, scream if you need to scream.
This feeling is impermanent, it was not there just a few minutes ago. And it will disappear within the next few minutes. But there is always a lesson to be learned in every situation. What triggered this emotion? And how can you remove that trigger or learn how to deal with it more creatively? Why did it affect you in the way it did?
Liberate yourself from this emotion. Let it be whatever it is. Do not create stories around it or interpretations of it. Do not replay it over and over in your mind. Do not let that inner voice define you…let it go.
Becoming mindful with your emotions and how they affect you is a practice. It’s something you need to be aware of every time you hear that inner voice start its chatter or whenever self-doubt arises. As with any practice, you will get better the more you do it.
Discover how to approach specific emotions with our slideshare presentation. Click Here